Maledicte

• It's exactly a week until my first class, and I am thinking up new projects to attempt to put my time into. What the hell am I thinking? (Besides that I could make a few bucks, possibly.) Definitely need to get some supplies this weekend and see if any of this is manageable. At all.

• Mother returns tomorrow night. And will be here when I start school. And for Parent's Weekend. \o/

• Also this weekend: Blackberry, hair cut, new clothes. I am looking forward to all of this as it signals a sort of... shift in my "image". To something I might actually like more. (You know, as opposed to changing one's image purposefully to something one likes less.) So that will probably be neat.

• I need socks.

• ( Some pictures from my garden this week. )

• I am fretting a little bit about fantasybigbang. Just a little bit. Artist and mixers are sort of slowly trickling in, but we still have about 1/4 artist/mixers as we do authors. Still, there's more than a month to fix this, so I am getting on it right now. If you guys know any artists who might be interested, poke them. :>

• I keep forgetting to take my jeans to the seamstress. I'd like to be able to wear my new jeans. Yeah, I know. I haven't been able to yet. It's ridiculous.

Two things!

Number one: My latest impulsive buy:


Number two: I did some writing. The story, And Seven Were Deadly, can be found here.

Happy V-Day, to my flist.



Yes, I am wearing all black. I don't much like this holiday. I don't believe in it. And it never has anything to do with being single. I had a boyfriend last V-Day and I still didn't like it.

( It is cold and snowy. )

I kind of would like my best friend back.

So, for the first time in my life someone I know has died. Or at least, someone I knew and was relatively close to. My grandmother's best friend, and like an aunt to me, passed away in her sleep the night before last. She had cancer, and the last year or so has been pretty bad, and everyone is a little relieved that it was an easy death with no trauma and not too much pain.

But I have to wonder why I'm not emotional about this.

Sure, I'm going to miss her. I loved her. She was great. But I'm not feeling a great sense of loss or anything. I'm not close to tears. Nothing. I heard the news last night, I accepted it. Done.

Which leads me to wonder about my emotional state. Sure, I tell people all the time that I'm heartless. And for intents and purposes, it's true. Being "heartless" and unfeeling is just a way not to feel any pain. I know, everyone is thinking, "But then you don't feel the happiness too," and you're all wrong. I get sad, sure. I just don't feel emotional pain, I think. Which has been, in the past, not an issue. Like the fact that I have a hard time trusting people fully. ( Which isn't to say there aren't people I trust. Hell, there are a whole lot of people I would trust with my life. ) But I don't fee anything over her death. She's just gone. There's nothing I can do.

Well, whatever. I'm sure that was supposed to help me figure something out.

Here are some pictures of Sky from Alpha and Confluence.

( Pics! )